I'm meant to post my blog on a Monday, so how come it's Tuesday afternoon and I'm only just pressing the launch button? Truth is, it's me who set the original timelines, me who went away for the weekend to celebrate my 50th birthday, me who had a huge deal of client prep and 4 client sessions booked in yesterday, and ME who chooses to feel under pressure ... or not, as it turns out.
So I moved my blog by 1 day. I chose not to feel unnecessarily pressurised. And I feel fine about it.
A great deal of the pressure we feel, comes from our internal barometer, based on what we've decided we SHOULD be able to achieve.
Feel like you should always stay later at work? Convinced you should be as skinny as your thinnest friend? Certain your parents are more proud of your sibling? Quietly willing your boss to ask a question only you can answer?..... Where does all this pressure come from?
It's part of the human condition to think negatively as opposed to positively. This is due to our primitive need to keep ourselves safe. As youngsters we take on plenty of false beliefs about how we should be to be accepted, popular, clever, valued. Adolescence does nothing to help us correct these beliefs and often serves to lock them in further as we strive to fit in; validating our value from external approval rather than an inner confidence and comfort with who we are and what we have to offer.
The upshot can be that we set incredibly high, often unachievable goals for ourselves. Here is where the pressure comes in.
Make a list of the things that are creating pressure for you right now. Now ask yourself where the pressure is really coming from...., could it be you're helping create it or adding to it?
Maybe it's time to see it for what it is; completely powerless if you choose to let it go.
If you recognise any of these signs of unrealistic pressure, maybe you can learn to be a little kinder to yourself
* you never feel good enough
* you are never satisfied with what you achieve or have
* you feel constantly stressed or overwhelmed
* you woorry about trying in case you fail
I can help you to work though this. Please feel free to reach out if you have any questions. This is me, signing off, on a TUESDAY! Who knew....